I finally have a free moment to sit and write something that might make some sense regarding mentoring the homeless.
It's safe to say that the people who end up homeless are from very dysfunctional families, abusive situations, like the orphanage and foster care kids that aged out. They never had a sense of belonging anywhere and once homeless, they are grouped together with people whose lives are equally or more screwed up than their own. Except for occasional help from agencies, they're on their own.
Once homeless, the feeling of not belonging intensifies as no one wants them around - the police pick on them (with good reason most of the time), no one wants shelters or services near residential areas or businesses. What better way to compound a sense of not belonging than to be a "bum." I can totally understand the desire to build a shelter in an area removed from the business district, but for the homeless person, this is just another way of saying get lost.
The other issue with homeless folks is that they have nothing to do once they get sucked into the downward spiral of their living conditions. They don't think like someone who is not homeless does, even if they had a comfortable existence prior. For instance, they will panhandle quarters for $1.00 24 oz beers, but wouldn't think to use those quarters to dry their blanket at a laundromat. Things like this need to be pointed out and reminded over and over again until it becomes part of their mentality. What we think is simple is not for many of them.
Mentoring would help pull many folks back into mainstream. There are so many little things that a mentor could do, such as reminding a person to wash their hands before having a cup of coffee or a meal, remembering birthdays, holidays, talking about the homeless person's life, past, present and future, asking the homeless person their opinions, hopes, etc. I gave my guy a little research project at the library that gave him something to do.
A mentoring relationship would probably work best if established by word-of-mouth. The social workers, rightfully so, have rules about confidentiality, ethics, etc., so it would be unlikely that BCCAP would refer a person to a mentor. Mentoring really means developing a friendship and being a support to another person.
Though I've given out my phone number to more than 25 homeless folks, not one has ever abused it. Hospitals have called me as a contact person, I've even worked with the Bergen County Jail physicians because an inmate gave them my number, but I've never received crank calls or calls in the early morning. However, sharing personal info would be up to the mentor and I would not recommend it until a trusting relationship has been established.
Finding a homeless person is quite easy in Hackensack (you could email me at holistichell@yahoo.com) just by a walk up Main Street, a stroll through Anderson Park, or a visit to the Hackensack Library. The library and Anderson Park are better places to meet because unruly or very drunk people are kicked out. Going to CAP at night or Faith Foundation might be overwhelming.
There is one thing that became clear to me in my work and that is - there is not enough food to feed the hungry in Hackensack. The Salvation Army closed and with it went a hot meal. Kansas St has "brunch" around 11 a.m., so that is the first meal really available on a regular basis and that consists of bologna sandwiches, hot dogs, etc. Then CAP serves dinner at 4-5 pm. There are a few weekend breakfasts served at churches. Homeless people do not qualify for food stamps or only get a few dollars per month, as they have no place to store food. Center for Food Action distributes to individuals only 6 x per year, and the Salvation Army pantry at 2nd Reformed has been low and\or out of food recently. Food would definitely provide a vehicle for establishing a relationship.
If anyone wants further info, please email me at holistichell@yahoo.com.